Mary Poppins Page 5

  On this night, long after the Red Calf was asleep, the Red Cow stood up suddenly and began to dance. She danced wildly and beautifully and in perfect time, though she had no music to go by. Sometimes it was a polka, sometimes a Highland Fling and sometimes a special dance that she made up out of her own head. And in between these dances she would curtsey and make sweeping bows and knock her head against the dandelions.

  "Dear me!" said the Red Cow to herself, as she began on a Sailor's Hornpipe. "What an extraordinary thing! I always thought dancing improper, but it can't be since I myself am dancing. For I am a model cow."

  And she went on dancing, and thoroughly enjoying herself. At last, however, she grew tired and decided that she had danced enough and that she would go to sleep. But, to her great surprise, she found that she could not stop dancing. When she went to lie down beside the Red Calf, her legs would not let her. They went on capering and prancing and, of course, carrying her with them. Round and round the field she went, leaping and waltzing and stepping on tip-toe.

  "Dear me!" she murmured at intervals with a ladylike accent. "How very peculiar!" But she couldn't stop.

  In the morning she was still dancing and the Red Calf had to take its breakfast of dandelions all by itself because the Red Cow could not remain still enough to eat.

  All through the day she danced, up and down the meadow and round and round the meadow, with the Red Calf mooing piteously behind her. When the second night came, and she was still at it and still could not stop, she grew very worried. And at the end of a week of dancing she was nearly distracted.

  "I must go and see the King about it," she decided, shaking her head.

  So she kissed her Red Calf and told it to be good. Then she turned and danced out of the meadow and went to tell the King.

  She danced all the way, snatching little sprays of green food from the hedges as she went, and every eye that saw her stared with astonishment. But none of them were more astonished than the Red Cow herself.

  At last she came to the Palace where the King lived. She pulled the bell-rope with her mouth, and when the gate opened she danced through it and up the broad garden path till she came to the flight of steps that led to the King's throne.

  Upon this the King was sitting, busily making a new set of Laws. His Secretary was writing them down in a little red note-book, one after another, as the King thought of them. There were Courtiers and Ladies-in-Waiting everywhere, all very gorgeously dressed and all talking at once.

  "How many have I made today?" asked the King, turning to the Secretary. The Secretary counted the Laws he had written down in the red note-book.

  "Seventy-two, your Majesty," he said, bowing low and taking care not to trip over his quill pen, which was a very large one.

  "H'm. Not bad for an hour's work," said the King, looking very pleased with himself. "That's enough for today." He stood up and arranged his ermine cloak very tastefully.

  "Order my coach. I must go to the Barber's," he said magnificently.

  It was then that he noticed the Red Cow approaching. He sat down again and took up his sceptre.

  "What have we here, ho?" he demanded, as the Red Cow danced to the foot of the steps.

  "A Cow, your Majesty!" she answered simply.

  "What have we here, ho?"

  "I can see that," said the King. "I still have my eyesight. But what do you want? Be quick, because I have an appointment with the Barber at ten. He won't wait for me longer than that and I must have my hair cut. And for goodness' sake stop jigging and jagging about like that!" he added irritably. "It makes me quite giddy."

  "Quite giddy!" echoed all the Courtiers, staring.

  "That's just my trouble, your Majesty. I can't stop!" said the Red Cow piteously.

  "Can't stop? Nonsense!" said the King furiously. "Stop at once I, the King, command you!"

  "Stop at once! The King commands you!" cried all the Courtiers.

  The Red Cow made a great effort. She tried so hard to stop dancing that every muscle and every rib stood out like mountain ranges all over her. But it was no good. She just went on dancing at the foot of the King's steps.

  "I have tried, your Majesty. And I can't. I've been dancing now for seven days running. And I've had no sleep. And very little to eat. A white-thorn spray or two—that's all. So I've come to ask your advice."

  "H'm—very curious," said the King, pushing the crown on one side and scratching his head.

  "Very curious," said the Courtiers, scratching their heads, too.

  "What does it feel like?" asked the King.

  "Funny," said the Red Cow. "And yet," she paused, as if choosing her words, "it's rather a pleasant feeling, too. As if laughter were running up and down inside me."

  "Extraordinary," said the King, and he put his chin on his hand and stared at the Red Cow, pondering on what was the best thing to do.

  Suddenly he sprang to his feet and said:

  "Good gracious!"

  "What is it?" cried all the Courtiers.

  "Why, don't you see?" said the King, getting very excited and dropping his sceptre. "What an idiot I was not to have noticed it before. And what idiots you were!" He turned furiously upon the Courtiers. "Don't you see that there's a fallen star caught on her horn?"

  "So there is!" cried the Courtiers, as they all suddenly noticed the star for the first time. And as they looked it seemed to them that the star grew brighter.

  "That's what's wrong!" said the King. "Now, you Courtiers had better pull it off so that this—er—lady can stop dancing and have some breakfast. It's the star, madam, that is making you dance," he said to the Red Cow. "Now, come along, you!"

  And he motioned to the Chief Courtier, who presented himself smartly before the Red Cow and began to tug at the star. It would not come off. The Chief Courtier was joined by one after another of the other Courtiers, until at last there was a long chain of them, each holding the man in front of him by the waist, and a tug-of-war began between the Courtiers and the star.

  "Mind my head!" entreated the Red Cow.

  "Pull harder!" roared the King.

  They pulled harder. They pulled until their faces were red as raspberries. They pulled till they could pull no longer and all fell back, one on top of the other. The star did not move. It remained firmly fixed to the horn.

  "Tch, tch, tch!" said the King. "Secretary, look in the Encyclopaedia and see what it says about cows with stars on their horns."

  The Secretary knelt down and began to crawl under the throne. Presently he emerged, carrying a large green book which was always kept there in case the King wanted to know anything.

  He turned the pages.

  "There's nothing at all, your Majesty, except the story of the Cow Who Jumped Over the Moon, and you know all about that."

  The King rubbed his chin, because that helped him to think.

  He sighed irritably and looked at the Red Cow.

  "All I can say," he said, "is that you'd better try that too."

  "Try what?" said the Red Cow.

  "Jumping over the moon. It might have an effect. Worth trying, anyway."

  "Me?" said the Red Cow, with an outraged stare.

  "Yes, you—who else?" said the King impatiently. He was anxious to get to the Barber's.

  "Sire," said the Red Cow, "I beg you to remember that I am a decent, respectable animal and have been taught from my infancy that jumping was no occupation for a lady."

  The King stood up and shook his sceptre at her.

  "Madam," he said, "you came here for my advice and I have given it to you. Do you want to go on dancing for ever? Do you want to go hungry for ever? Do you want to go sleepless for ever?"

  The Red Cow thought of the lush sweet taste of dandelions. She thought of meadow grass and how soft it was to lie on. She thought of her weary capering legs and how nice it would be to rest them. And she said to herself: "Perhaps, just for once, it wouldn't matter and nobody—except the King—need know."

  "How high d
o you suppose it is?" she said aloud as she danced.

  The King looked up at the Moon.

  "At least a mile, I should think," said he.

  The Red Cow nodded. She thought so, too. For a moment she considered, and then she made up her mind.

  "I never thought that I should come to this, your Majesty. Jumping—and over the moon at that. But—I'll try it," she said and curtseyed gracefully to the throne.

  "Good," said the King pleasantly, realising that he would be in time for the Barber, after all. "Follow me!"

  He led the way into the garden, and the Red Cow and the Courtiers followed him.

  "Now," said the King, when he reached the open lawn, "when I blow the whistle—jump!"

  He took a large golden whistle from his waistcoat pocket and blew into it lightly to make sure there was no dust in it.

  The Red Cow danced at attention.

  "Now—one!" said the King.

  "Two!"

  "Three!"

  Then he blew the whistle.

  The Red Cow, drawing in her breath, gave one huge tremendous jump and the earth fell away beneath her. She could see the figures of the King and the Courtiers growing smaller and smaller until they disappeared below. She herself shot upwards through the sky, with the stars spinning around her like great golden plates, and presently, in blinding light, she felt the cold rays of the moon upon her. She shut her eyes as she went over it, and as the dazzling gleam passed behind her and she bent her head towards the earth again, she felt the star slip down her horn. With a great rush it fell off and went rolling down the sky. And it seemed to her that as it disappeared into the darkness great chords of music came from it and echoed through the air.

  In another minute the Red Cow had landed on the earth again. To her great surprise she found that she was not in the King's garden but in her own dandelion field.

  And she had stopped dancing! Her feet were as steady as though they were made of stone and she walked as sedately as any other respectable cow. Quietly and serenely she moved across the field, beheading her golden soldiers as she went to greet the Red Calf.

  "I'm so glad you're back!" said the Red Calf. "I've been so lonely."

  The Red Cow kissed it and fell to munching the meadow. It was her first good meal for a week. And by the time her hunger was satisfied she had eaten up several regiments. After that she felt better. She soon began to live her life just exactly as she had lived it before.

  At first she enjoyed her quiet regular habits very much, and was glad to be able to eat her breakfast without dancing and to lie down in the grass and sleep at night instead of curtseying to the moon until the morning.

  But after a little she began to feel uncomfortable and dissatisfied. Her dandelion field and her Red Calf were all very well, but she wanted something else and she couldn't think what it was. At last she realised that she was missing her star. She had grown so used to dancing and to the happy feeling the star had given her that she wanted to do a Sailor's Hornpipe and to have the star on her horn again.

  She fretted, she lost her appetite, her temper was atrocious. And she frequently burst into tears for no reason at all. Eventually, she went to my Mother and told her the whole story and asked her advice.

  "Good gracious, my dear!" my Mother said to her. "You don't suppose that only one star ever fell out of the sky! Billions fall every night, I'm told. But they fall in different places, of course. You can't expect two stars to drop in the same field in one lifetime."

  "Then, you think—if I moved about a bit——?" the Red Cow began, a happy eager look coming into her eyes.

  "If it were me," said my Mother, "I'd go and look for one."

  "I will," said the Red Cow joyously, "I will indeed."

  Mary Poppins paused.

  "And that, I suppose, is why she was walking down Cherry-Tree Lane," Jane prompted gently.

  "Yes," whispered Michael, "she was looking for her star."

  Mary Poppins sat up with a little start. The intent look had gone from her eyes and the stillness from her body.

  "Come down from that window at once, sir!" she said crossly. "I am going to turn on the lights." And she hurried across the landing to the electric light switch.

  "Michael!" said Jane in a careful whisper. "Just have one look and see if the cow's still there."

  Hurriedly Michael peered out through the gathering dusk.

  "Quickly!" said Jane. "Mary Poppins will be back in one minute. Can you see her?"

  "No-o-o," said Michael, staring out. "Not a sign of her. She's gone."

  "I do hope she finds it!" said Jane, thinking of the Red Cow roaming through the world looking for a star to stick on her horn.

  "So do I," said Michael as, at the sound of Mary Poppins's returning footsteps, he hurriedly pulled down the blind....

  CHAPTER 6

  BAD TUESDAY (Revised version)

  IT WAS NOT very long afterwards that Michael woke up one morning with a curious feeling inside him. He knew, the moment he opened his eyes, that something was wrong but he was not quite sure what it was.

  "What is today, Mary Poppins?" he enquired, pushing the bedclothes away from him.

  "Tuesday," said Mary Poppins. "Go and turn on your bath. Hurry!" she said, as he made no effort to move. He turned over and pulled the bedclothes up over his head and the curious feeling increased.

  "What did I say?" said Mary Poppins in that cold, clear voice that was always a Warning.

  Michael knew now what was happening to him. He knew he was going to be naughty.

  "I won't," he said slowly, his voice muffled by the blanket.

  Mary Poppins twitched the clothes from his hand and looked down upon him.

  "I WON'T."

  He waited, wondering what she would do and was surprised when, without a word, she went into the bathroom and turned on the tap herself. He took his towel and went slowly in as she came out. And for the first time in his life Michael entirely bathed himself. He knew by this that he was in disgrace, and he purposely neglected to wash behind his ears.

  "Shall I let out the water?" he enquired in the rudest voice he had.

  There was no reply.

  "Pooh, I don't care!" said Michael, and the hot heavy weight that was within him swelled and grew larger. "I don't care!"

  He dressed himself then, putting on his best clothes, that he knew were only for Sunday. And after that he went downstairs, kicking the banisters with his feet—a thing he knew he should not do as it waked up everybody else in the house. On the stairs he met Ellen, the housemaid, and as he passed her he knocked the hot-water jug out of her hand.

  "Well, you are a clumsy," said Ellen, as she bent down to mop up the water. "That was for your father's shaving."

  "I meant to," said Michael calmly.

  Ellen's red face went quite white with surprise.

  "Meant to? You meant—well, then, you're a very bad heathen boy, and I'll tell your Ma, so I will——"

  "Do," said Michael, and he went on down the stairs.

  Well, that was the beginning of it. Throughout the rest of the day nothing went right with him. The hot, heavy feeling inside him made him do the most awful things, and as soon as he'd done them he felt extraordinarily pleased and glad and thought out some more at once.

  In the kitchen Mrs. Brill, the cook, was making scones.

  "No, Master Michael," she said, "you can't scrape out the basin. It's not empty yet."

  And at that he let out his foot and kicked Mrs. Brill very hard on the shin, so that she dropped the rolling-pin and screamed aloud.

  "You kicked Mrs. Brill? Kind Mrs. Brill? I'm ashamed of you," said his Mother a few minutes later when Mrs. Brill had told her the whole story. "You must beg her pardon at once. Say you're sorry, Michael!"

  "But I'm not sorry. I'm glad. Her legs are too fat," he said, and before they could catch him he ran away up the area steps and into the garden. There he purposely bumped into Robertson Ay, who was sound asleep on top of one of the be
st rock plants, and Robertson Ay was very angry.

  "I'll tell your Pa!" he said threateningly.

  "And I'll tell him you haven't cleaned the shoes this morning," said Michael, and was a little astonished at himself. It was his habit and Jane's always to protect Robertson Ay, because they loved him and didn't want to lose him.

  But he was not astonished long, for he had begun to wonder what he could do next. And it was no time before he thought of something.

  Through the bars of the fence he could see Miss Lark's Andrew daintily sniffing at the Next Door lawn and choosing for himself the best blades of grass. He called softly to Andrew and gave him a biscuit out of his own pocket, and while Andrew was munching it he tied Andrew's tail to the fence with a piece of string. Then he ran away with Miss Lark's angry, outraged voice screaming in his ears, and his body almost bursting with the exciting weight of that heavy thing inside him.

  The door of his Father's study stood open—for Ellen had just been dusting the books. So Michael did a forbidden thing. He went in, sat down at his Father's desk, and with his Father's pen began to scribble on the blotter. Suddenly his elbow, knocking against the inkpot, upset it, and the chair and the desk and the quill pen and his own best clothes were covered with great spreading stains of blue ink. It looked dreadful, and fear of what would happen to him stirred within Michael. But, in spite of that, he didn't care—he didn't feel the least bit sorry.

  "That child must be ill," said Mrs. Banks, when she was told by Ellen—who suddenly returned and discovered him—of the latest adventure. "Michael, you shall have some syrup of figs."

  "I'm not ill. I'm weller than you," said Michael rudely.

  "Then you're simply naughty," said his Mother. "And you shall be punished."

  And, sure enough, five minutes later, Michael found himself standing in his stained clothes in a corner of the nursery, facing the wall.

  Jane tried to speak to him when Mary Poppins was not looking, but he would not answer, and put out his tongue at her. When John and Barbara crawled along the floor and each took hold of one of his shoes and gurgled, he just pushed them roughly away. And all the time he was enjoying his badness, hugging it to him as though it were a friend, and not caring a bit.